Blanks...

Oh how quickly motivation dies. I really was super excited about this whole contract thing and then my stupid laziness trumped everything. Exactly what I said shouldn't happen. I did not go to the gym on Saturday  morning. Or Sunday. Or Monday. I didn't even exercise at all. Why? I have no real grasp on the answer to that question. I just didn't. I didn't feel ill. I wasn't depressed about anything. I didn't have something better to do. I just didn't exercise. I slept in on Saturday morning and spent the evening hanging out with friends. On Sunday I slept in and then spent the evening folding laundry and watching The Real World. And I worked both days.

This seems to be a recurring issue. My follow through, or lack thereof. I was even feeling really good because measurements happened on Thursday and I've lost a total of 40 lbs. But that joy is not as wonderful as it could be because I allowed myself to not care. And that is awful. Sure I can declare my intentions but when it comes to actually sticking with this thirty day challenge, I'm like a gun filled with blanks: all talk and no walk.

I'm awful, boo hoo, I think we all get the point. I do have to share my victory, however. Despite ignoring the articles in my own constitution about exercise, I crazy adhered to the ones about food. And it was incredibly challenging. I worked at Target on both Saturday and Sunday and Monday and each time was incredibly tempted to get pizza and breadsticks. Did the carbs win? No. I won. Instead I had salads and bananas and yogurt and a peach and an apple. And did I drink any soda? No sirs and madams. I drank nothing but water. 

Ultimately, I'll call the weekend a victory, albeit a small one. Despite my failure in one area, I continued to succeed in another. My failure, which was large, didn't lead me to decide the whole weekend was a wash. I absolutely need to do better in the future, but or now, I'll skip beating myself up and look at what I can continue to do in the coming days.